Thursday, September 25, 2008

I am Not a Pundit

And I have no idea what the American People's response to the last 48 hours will be, but I have to say that, from where I sit, John McCain had 4 advantages over Obama 1 month ago:

1) Experience, esp. in foreign policy
2) Reputation as a truth-teller
3) Cozy relationship w/ the media
4) Reputation as tougher and less wimpy in a crisis

And, from this l'il ol' chair, I can't help but think that between Palin, the negative ads, the Palin seclusion campaign, and the suspension freakout, he may have blown all of them BY HIMSELF in a month.

Now, just to prevent jinxing, I'm going to tap on wood, throw salt over my shoulder, and spit three times.

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

A prayer

Dear God, let this be the shoe vomit.

P.S. I spent yesterday vacuuming moth larvae from the ceiling. I would prefer not to have to do that again, thanks.

Monday, September 22, 2008

Ugh

And on a wildly more personal note, I just realized tonight why we are suffering our 2nd annual late summer/early fall moth infestation.

Last year, the moths all decided to live in our bread board (in its convenient plastic crumb-catching tray, feasting on our crumbs). So, of course, this year, we've been diligently checking and washing the brea
d board. No moths there, but yet somehow still moths.

Until tonight, when after making a post-Passion Play cup of cocoa, I saw. The moths have been living:

1) in our whole wheat flour jar from IKEA

and

2) in the dog biscuits

Both of which, are, of course, safely in the trash bag, which is safely in the trash container outside. But, still. Ugh. I killed about 5 out of 8 moths that I saw tonight, and I'll try to finish them off in the next few days, but I'm feeling a little too grossed out to go to bed alone right now.

And, in all the moth business, I wasn't able to drink my cocoa, so now it's cold and has a skin. Double ugh. I saw a 4 hour play tonight. I wanted my cocoa.

Saturday, September 13, 2008

Barack Obama will never read this post

So I can feel pretty sure that my campaign advice can offered without fear of affecting things badly.

Everyone's shorts are in a knot (mine included) about what Obama should do faced with an attack of lies, more lies, fake outrage, and fake outrage + lies.

Go negative? Hire Bill Clinton? Stay positive? Make more ads about the 80s? Okay, no one wants that. Here's my two cents, for whatever it's worth (and, at this point, I think it's worth is primarily keeping me sane):

There's a scene in the 1st season of Mad Men where our protagonist, Don Draper -- 40ish, fit, talented -- invites his boss, Roger Sterling -- older, white haired, ruthless -- over to his home for dinner. Over the course of dinner Sterling gets drunk and makes a pass at Don's wife. Don is livid, but what can he do? Hit the man? No. Insult him? Unlikely. So, he says nothing, and, the next day, Sterling invites him to lunch. Where they eat and eat and drink and drink. When I watched this episode, I was like "geez, why all the oysters and cocktails?" Upon returning to the office, the men are told by an elevator operator (whom we saw Don chatting with earlier) that the elevator is out. So they take the stairs. Up twenty five flights. Don is younger and better at it, Sterling refuses to ask for a break, and when they arrive at Floor 25, Sterling walks in the door and promptly vomits 32 oysters all over the shoes of their client.

Obama's job? Keep going up the stairs. And bribe the elevator guy. McCain and Palin are going to vomit all over the American public. And we just have to hope they don't like it.

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Tony Kushner's imaginary drag name

As he writes in the introduction to Homebody/Kabul, would be "Eara Lee Prescient"

And I have to say that's how I feel re-reading my last column in light of the whole Sarah Palin shebang. What are we talking about? Her kids, her uterus, her kids' uteruses, and her physical appearance.*

Politicians. And women politicians.

Not that women writers or feminists are being uniformly helpful about this either. They've made the personal their stock-in-trade, and so our presidential election becomes an extension of the Mommy Wars. I like her. I hate her. So what? Do you think she'd be a good presidential understudy? The most cynical thing I think I've thought this election cycle was when somebody said, "They're just nominating her to get the women's vote." My first reaction was "Oh, that won't be bad for the Democrats. Women hate other women." And scene.

I'm hoping that the 24-hour media cycle, billion-blog news OD thing will give way, at least a little, to issues of substance. (I know, a girl can dream). Although I have to admit that this inclines me toward despair. What can I do? Stop reading the stupid Internets like it's going out of style, and remember to breathe. We'll see how well those go.

*And yes, like 99% of women, she is both the victim of this and it's eager perpetrator. Who put this stuff on the table? Often Palin herself. Does that mean it's worth talking about? I don't really think so.